WWE Royal Rumble 2018 Results

Sometimes it's silly to go away from the odds, apparently.

Asuka and Shinsuke Nakamura were the victors of their respective Royal Rumbles, which is nice enough, though ultimately a little too predictable for my taste. The Rumble matches were good, but the other matches were pretty disappointing in my opinion.

WWE Title Handicap Match: A.J. Styles (c) versus Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn

More referee screwiness? We haven't had enough of that already? I get that they wanted to start the build for Styles/Nakamura right away, but after SmackDown this week, we know that there'll be a title shot at Fastlane between Styles and either Owens or Zayn. So there's still plenty of "unknown" heading into Wrestlemania season.

Would've been cool to see how they handled the co-champion idea, but again, predictability wins out.

My prediction: A.J. Styles via pinfall over Sami Zayn

Result: A.J. Styles via pinfall over Kevin Owens

SmackDown Tag Team Championship Match: The Usos (c) vs. Shelton Benjamin and Chad Gable

This one was a shocker, for a number of reasons. First, the match wasn't all that great, which is surprising with the people involved. And second, I really did believe that the Usos would lose their tag titles after Jey's arrest for driving drunk.

Why even have this match if Benjamin and Gable lose here? It makes them look weak, and doesn't prop up the Usos at all. I think they would've been way better off pushing Bobby Roode's match from the pre-show to the main show and giving it some more time to breathe, and maybe dropping Luke Harper vs. Bo Dallas or something into the pre-show. Anything else would've been an improvement.

My prediction: Shelton Benjamin via pinfall over Jey Uso
Result: Uso #1 via pinfall over Shelton Benjamin

Men's Royal Rumble Match

Like I said, it was cool Nakamura won, even if it was pretty predictable. Honestly, I would've kind of liked to see what Philly did if Roman Reigns eliminated Nakamura to end the Rumble. But of course, that would've set up the Elimination Chamber as a match for the Universal title, and you know Brock Lesnar can't wrestle more than 8 times a year. You don't want to burn three of those matches by April.

Overall the match was pretty good, I thought they actually did a better job than they've done in years of capturing the old school style of people doing a lot of punching and struggling in corners, rather than the obnoxious "ABC enters the ring, does his finisher four times, everyone lays around the ring waiting for the next guy."

Hilariously, I find myself already imagining what we might see out of next year's Royal Rumble. I'm like an addict.

My predictions
Longest time in match: The Miz
Final four competitors: The Miz, Roman Reigns, John Cena, Rusev
Winner: John Cena

Results
Longest time in match: Finn Balor
Final four competitors: Roman Reigns, John Cena, Shinsuke Nakamura, Finn Balor
Winner: Shinsuke Nakamura

RAW Tag Team Championship Match - Seth Rollins and Jason Jordan (c) vs. Sheamus and Cesaro

Pretty predictable result, though I didn't expect Jordan to be basically a no-show. I'm interested to see how the RAW tag division evolves over the next couple months. It could go up, or it could go way down.

My prediction: Sheamus via pinfall over Rollins
Result: Sheamus via pinfall over Rollins

Universal Title Triple Threat Match: Brock Lesnar (c) vs. Braun Strowman vs. Kane

Really crappy match. Even the big spots weren't interesting or impressive. Completely predictable, and despite their intentions, it doesn't preserve Braun's strength. He's lost three different Universal title matches at this point. He deserves to be set aside for someone else.

My prediction: Brock Lesnar via pinfall over Kane
Result: Brock Lesnar via pinfall over Kane

Women's Royal Rumble Match

I gotta say, I was impressed by the women in this match. A few of the legends showed a little bit of age, but honestly, almost everybody looked to be in good shape and very capable of handling themselves. The eliminations weren't any more obvious than the men's match, which is all you can ask for.

Asuka is obviously very popular right now, and her winning makes plenty of sense. I loved her confrontation with Ember Moon; those two have fantastic chemistry, and there's so much character in the ring when they're facing off. I'm also glad that Ember got an Eclipse off before getting eliminated; non-NXT fans need to see that move.

My Predictions
Longest time in match: Sasha Banks
Final four competitors: Nikki Cross, Bayley, Becky Lynch, Nikki Bella
Winner: Becky Lynch

Results
Longest time in match: Sasha Banks
Final four competitors: Sasha Banks, Nikki Bella, Brie Bella, Asuka
Winner: Asuka

Afterword/Summary

The whole Rhonda Rousey moment didn't mean anything to me; I'm not a UFC fan, and star-power doesn't do much for me when it comes to wrestling. The word is that Rousey will be a full-time wrestler, but this was already an important event for the future of women's wrestling. I'm not sure you needed to double down after the women's Royal Rumble with Rousey.

Overall, I thought it was just an okay event. The two Rumble matches were very good, but the other matches were mostly garbage. It's a stark contrast to last year's Royal Rumble which had an incredible WWE Title match between John Cena and A.J. Styles, and a very, very good Universal Title match between Kevin Owens and Roman Reigns.

Ah well. Hopefully Elimination Chamber gives us some magic. See you then!

WWE Royal Rumble 2018 Predictions

Ahh, the Rumble. From the first time I ever saw it, it's been my favorite wrestling pay-per-view. The drama is fantastic, the matches are always full of action, and since like 1998, you get to hear 30 entrance songs in one match, which is basically the whole reason I watch wrestling in the first place.

After watching NXT Takeover Philadelphia tonight (which was fantastic as usual), I'm ready to make predictions for what will no doubt be a disappointment top-to-bottom in this year's WWE Royal Rumble. The Rumble match itself has a lot of possible stuff to predict, so I'll use some of the scoresheet categories from one of my favorite podcasts, What's Wrong With Wrestling.

Here we go!

RAW Tag Team Championship Match - Seth Rollins and Jason Jordan (c) vs. Sheamus and Cesaro

In-ring, these guys are all really accomplished performers. Sheamus is probably the weakest of the four, but even he can put on a good match, and the rest are exceptional entertainers in the ring. I'm looking forward to the match, even though the build-up has been ho-hum.

I'd be surprised if this match ended clean, but I think in order to set up Wrestlemania season, you need the tag team titles on a true "tag team." Maybe that happens later, but since I do expect Rollins and Jordan to lose the titles between now and March, I'll just predict it here.

My prediction: Sheamus via pinfall over Rollins

SmackDown Tag Team Championship Match: The Usos (c) vs. Shelton Benjamin and Chad Gable

I think with the XFL's recent announcement and how Vince McMahon is selling it as a family-oriented product, and how the WWE has been PG-rated content for a while, the WWE is probably pretty pissed at Jey Uso for his DWI arrest. The most frequent punishment for misbehavior is to have the performer's on-air character get time off, but you can't do that if the Usos are tag team champions.

So, naturally, that means Benjamin and Gable ought to win this match. It's also like their tenth try at the titles, so for the love of god, let's get them the titles. It can also set up a really awkward backstage segment later in the night where Gable runs up to Jordan and says, "Dude, look! I won the tag titles!...oh...right...sorry dude..."

My prediction: Shelton Benjamin via pinfall over Jey Uso

Universal Title Triple Threat Match: Brock Lesnar (c) vs. Braun Strowman vs. Kane

I would looooove if they found a way to give Kane the Universal title here, but there's really just no chance of that. The most likely result is that Kane takes the fall for Lesnar, with the second-most-likely result being Strowman pinning Kane for the title. The chances of the WWE putting Kane over on either of the other two guys is infinitesimal.

I think Lesnar is most likely to retain the title through Wrestlemania, since it looks like their plan all year has been to set up Roman Reigns versus Brock Lesnar at Mania. It's possible there's some roundabout adjustments, where Lesnar loses to Strowman, then Strowman loses it to Lesnar or Reigns at Elimination Chamber, meaning you can still have Lesnar and Reigns fight for the title as the main event.

Still, most likely result is most likely.

My prediction: Brock Lesnar via pinfall over Kane

WWE Title Handicap Match: A.J. Styles (c) versus Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn

What a weird match. The insanity of trying to figure out what would happen if Sami and Kevin win makes me wish that happens. If it happens, SmackDown will be a must-see event, which to me is a great reason to do that. But I think usually stuff like this is an indicator of some haphazard planning, with the knowledge that they'll just have the champion retain so they don't have to figure out what happens in the weird circumstance.

So I expect Styles to pull out the win.

My prediction: A.J. Styles via pinfall over Sami Zayn

Women's Royal Rumble Match

I expect it to not be nearly as good as a men's Royal Rumble, just based on the logistics of smaller people having more trouble going over the top rope with natural movement. So I think we'll get a lot of the women sort of noticeably "throwing themselves" over the top rope. Still, there are enough good workers that the actual in-ring competition should be fun.

The smart money is on Asuka, as it seems like everything is setting up for her to be in the premier women's match at Wrestlemania. But that's putting a lot of eggs into the basket of someone whose English is still unexceptional. I think the WWE is more interested in playing it safe here, and they'll go with one of the most reliable, well-liked, and talented women they've got under contract: Becky Lynch. Asuka can get screwed over by another competitor to set up her own rivalry moving forward.

Longest time in match: Sasha Banks
Final four competitors: Nikki Cross, Bayley, Becky Lynch, Nikki Bella
Winner: Becky Lynch

Men's Royal Rumble Match

The big mamma jamma, the main event, the Royal Rumble. I have such high hopes, as always; hopefully they're not misplaced.

I'd love to be surprised by something amazing like Chris Jericho winning the Rumble, but I don't think that's likely. The most likely result, again, is something that works to set up one of the two matches built up so far for Wrestlemania: Styles v. Nakamura or Reigns v. Lesnar. That means the two most likely victors are Nakamura and Reigns.

I go back and forth on it. Nakamura has certainly put in his time and his losses, losing his title matches against Jinder Mahal. But Reigns is just so obviously going to be in the main event once again at Wrestlemania, he's just an easy pick.

I'm gonna go off the board, since I can't pick between those two guys, and pick a guy who could win any match, any night: John Cena. You can definitely work him into any main event feud, he's as popular as he's ever been, and he's taken some lumps this year. He could use a lift, and if he eliminates Roman to win, he'll even get some more cheers than usual.

Longest time in match: The Miz
Final four competitors: The Miz, Roman Reigns, John Cena, Rusev
Winner: John Cena

Please, please, please be a good show.

WWE Clash of Champions 2017 Results

Results time!

Zack Ryder vs. Mojo Rawley

I didn't love the feel of this match, though the action was decent enough. My problem was there were too many points where I knew I was supposed to think that Mojo is some sort of monster, and he's just not. He's a pretty big guy who's obviously getting a push, but Zack Ryder is a former Intercontinental Champion. Ryder should be able to hang with anyone who isn't a true monster.

Anyways, Rawley with the win after a big punch.

My prediction: Rawley via pin
Result: Rawley via pin

United States Championship Match: Baron Corbin (c) vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Bobby Roode

This was the match of the night in my book, and it wasn't really close. Ziggler is always brilliant, and Roode was good, but the story here to me was Corbin. His timing was really good, his moves were crisp, and the End of Days/Zig-Zag to finish the match was awesome. Who knows how long Ziggler will keep the title, but I was genuinely excited from start to finish.

My prediction: Corbin via pinfall on Ziggler
Result: Ziggler via pinfall on Corbin

Breezango vs. Bludgeon Brothers

Obvious squash is obvious.

My prediction: Bludgeon Brothers via pin
Result: Bludgeon Brothers via pin

Smackdown Women's Championship Lumberjack Match: Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Natalya

I guess this match was chaotic? Really it was just sloppy all around. The roving gangs of women outside the ring ended up mostly looking way too fake, and the only decent moments were the dives by Naomi and Charlotte.

The funniest/worst part was when Natalya gave a promo after the match and turned heel...from heel. Ridiculous.

My prediction: Flair wins via pinfall
Result: Flair wins via submission

SmackDown Tag Team Championship: The Usos (c) vs. The New Day vs. Shelton Benjamin and Chad Gable vs. Rusev and Aiden English

This match was alright, though I thought it still wasn't as good as it could've been. The New Day and The Usos have had some great matches, and adding the insanely over Rusev along with dynamite athletes in Gable and Benjamin, I thought the match could really be something special. I guess there's a point at which you have too many cooks though.

Those German suplexes that Chad Gable did near the end of the match were amazing. The one on Aiden English looked like it killed him, and the one on Big E was thunderous. I'm sold on these guys, let's get them a real tag-team name and give them the belts.

My prediction: Benjamin via pinfall on Rusev (for the inevitable boos)
Result: Uso #1 via pinfall on Gable

Randy Orton and Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn (with special referees Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan)

I hate to say it, but Daniel Bryan kind of ruined this match. No, ruined is too strong a word, because it was still alright. But I'm of the opinion that it could've been a lot better if Bryan was a better actor. The finish was muddy, as it ought to have been. A little more story advancement would've been cool, but that hasn't been WWE's mentality with PPVs for years.

Which is dumb, because that's how WCW overtook them. Superstars helped, but every WCW PPV from 1996-1999 left you with a question of, "Holy shit, what's gonna happen on Nitro??" Blah.

My prediction: Nakamura via pinfall on Zayn
Result: Zayn via pinfall on Orton

WWE Championship Match: A.J. Styles (c) vs. Jinder Mahal

This was by far Jinder's best match in WWE, at least that I've seen. He was crisp, violent, and other than his trunks (flesh brown? really?), he looked like a wrestler. Part of that is that A.J. Styles pretty much only puts on great matches, but it was also better than their previous title match in Manchester.

The match was good and the result was right. Not a bad main event.

My prediction: Styles via submission
Result: Styles via submission

Summary

The women's title match was terrible. Natalya is sluggish and clumsy, and the lumberjack gimmick didn't make up for that at all. The new girls need polish, Lana needs practice, and Tamina and Carmella need to be put in better situations. The tag matches were fine, as was Mojo vs. Zack. Jinder and AJ was good, and the triple threat match was great. All together, it was probably about a C+ event.

I really think the WWE does a poor job of tying pay-per-views to what's coming next. If you think about the big PPV moments, they were at least as much about storyline twists as they were about impressive matches. That's how you keep people coming back, how you capture your audience's attention.

I keep wishing they'll change, and they keep not changing. Who's more foolish?

PS: One last thing I want to say is that Boston came to play at Clash of Champions. The building was electric, and that can make a huge difference in how the event plays on TV. Well done, Boston.

WWE Clash of Champions 2017 Predictions

I'm looking over this card, and I'm not sure if I'm less tuned-in to what's going on in the wrestling universe than I had been, or if this pay-per-view is just a mish-mash of nonsense. Based on my expectations of the WWE, I would guess it's the latter. Still, could be some okay action at least. Let's get started.

Zack Ryder vs. Mojo Rawley

I wonder if this would've seemed a cleaner storyline if Ryder hadn't gotten hurt. As it is, it feels kind of irrelevant, which is okay, and unexciting, which isn't. When a tag team breaks up violently, you want the split to generate some fun segments, surprising interferences, etc. This has been kind of a slapdash concoction that seems like it expects to get by just by following the standard formula.

I don't think this rivalry will go head-to-head for too much longer, so I expect this to be the culmination of the main storyline here. And I think Mojo wins that main storyline.

My prediction: Rawley via pin

Breezango vs. Bludgeon Brothers

I can't imagine how Breezango would win this fight. Maybe The Ascension interferes? Who knows. The smart pick is 2B, with for a tag title match at Royal Rumble.

My prediction: Bludgeon Brothers via pin

Smackdown Women's Championship Lumberjack Match: Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Natalya

I'm kind of getting the sense that something is going to happen with this championship and the RAW women's title that prompts the implementation of a first-ever women's Royal Rumble. The call-ups of Ruby Riot(t) et. al., the return of Paige, Carmella still having the Money in the Bank briefcase, and the generally open nature of the RAW title picture makes me think that chaos is coming.

For this particular match, I expect things to break down early and often, and the whole scene to conclude in absolute disaster. I could see Carmella cashing in and then getting screwed out of winning the title by Becky Lynch, and then the resolution of the whole deal being related to the Royal Rumble.

My prediction: Flair wins via pinfall

United States Championship Match: Baron Corbin (c) vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Bobby Roode

I actually kind of have high hopes for this match. Corbin had a great match against The Miz at Survivor Series, which I didn't expect at all from either of those two. Bobby Roode is tremendous in the ring, and Ziggler might be even better. If these guys all meet their potential, this could be a match-of-the-year possibility.

As far as what to expect? It seems like Ziggler is kind of an afterthought these days, so it'd be really shocking to put the belt on him. I get the impression that after dropping the briefcase, Corbin is still slotted for a long-ish run as US champion. Ziggler is probably in the match to take a fall, so I think Corbin will get the drop on Ziggler.

My prediction: Corbin via pinfall on Ziggler

Randy Orton and Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn (with special referees Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan)

This match kind of feels similar to the women's championship match, where a lot of folks are in one place and nothing will get resolved by this. Nakamura put over Jinder a couple times, and I think he's on track for a big match versus A.J. Styles at the Rumble, or more likely Wrestlemania. That means he needs some noteworthy wins, and I think this is one of them.

More than a winner or loser, I'm interested to see the ending of match. Hopefully the culmination is something interesting, something that sets things off for "Wrestlemania season."

My prediction: Nakamura via pinfall on Zayn

SmackDown Tag Team Championship: The Usos (c) vs. The New Day vs. Shelton Benjamin and Chad Gable vs. Rusev and Aiden English

Hmm.

So, this is a match where I could see a lot of different things happening, and that's good. But when I think more about it, I think the answer becomes a little clearer.

Rusev is over as hell right now with his whole Rusev Day gimmick, so he doesn't really need a win, and obviously neither does Aiden English.

The New Day has done most of what they can with the titles, at least for the time being. I think the WWE would be better off mixing them up some more. All three of those guys put on exceptional matches.

So it's down to The Usos retaining or Benjamin and Gable winning. Either team should theoretically get run over by Harper and Rowen down the line, but I saw the Natural Disasters lose multiple times to Money Inc., so not everything is "monsters win."

If Jason Jordan was still with Gable, I'd lean on the Usos, but I think Shelton Benjamin brings the clout of the team up a notch, and a notch is all it will take. Plus remember how awesome Team Angle was? Maybe we can get some of that flavor back, with these two looking primed to turn heel any day now.

My prediction: Benjamin via pinfall on Rusev (for the inevitable boos)

WWE Championship Match: A.J. Styles (c) vs. Jinder Mahal

This seems like too easy an answer, right? The easy answer is for the Singh Brothers to pretend to be allied with Styles, side with Jinder again, but still come up short. Styles is a great guy to have as champion because you have a really great shot at a great main event for each of your pay-per-views.

I think this formula is simple enough even the WWE will understand it. This is a company that generally knows how to put a great champion on top. Shawn Michaels, The Undertaker, Stone Cold, Triple H, Kurt Angle, The Rock, Hulk Hogan, Bret Hart, CM Punk, John Cena, Brock Lesnar, these are all guys who can tell a story in the ring, and most of them are excellent, impressive wrestlers. Styles fits the bill there as well.

So, like I said, I'm going with Styles retaining.

My prediction: Styles via submission

The last SmackDown-only PPV was Hell in a Cell, which I really enjoyed. So the bar is high, hopefully they meet it. See you next week for a recap!

Survivor Series

Hey everyone, sorry about not getting predictions or recaps up for Survivor Series. I was fighting a miserable cold and honestly it completely just slipped my mind. We'll get back on the wagon for Clash of Champions.

WWE TLC 2017 Results

So obviously there was a big change-up in two of the matches at TLC, inserting AJ Styles and Kurt Angle for Bray Wyatt and Roman Reigns, respectively. I had a really shitty and busy weekend, and I gave it some thought and decided I wouldn't change my prediction based on the changes anyways, so I didn't post any updates.

Sasha Banks vs. Alicia Fox (Pre-Show)

My prediction: Fox via pin
Result: Banks via submission

Not that I care a whole lot, but I still think this was a waste of a match. You don't need to add a random win over Alicia Fox to convince me that Sasha Banks is really good. A six-day feud is just unnecessary.

Cedric Alexander and Rich Swann vs. The Brian Kendrick and Jack Gallagher

My prediction: Kendrick and Gallagher
Result: Alexander and Swann via pin

This match was fine. I picked it incorrectly, but again, my level of caring was just zero. Another situation where a manager would do a ton to give us some story substance. I think the biggest problem with 205 Live is that it gives potential managers a lot of space to go not be managers. And the WWE could really use some managers.

Emma vs. Asuka

My prediction: Asuka via submission
Result: Asuka via submission

Duh.

Raw Women's Championship Match: Alexa Bliss (c) vs. Mickie James

My prediction: Alexa Bliss via pin
Result: Alexa Bliss via pin

I love how Alexa manages to win these matches basically "clean," but always with some kind of tainting that makes you remember she's a heel. This time it was a fakeout begging off that let her lure Mickie into a turnbuckle smash and her finisher DDT. She's one of the best-booked heels in the company right now.

Cruiserweight Championship Match: Kalisto (c) vs. Enzo Amore

My prediction: Amore via pin
Result: Amore via pin

Kind of an old school "dirty" win for the heel, a thumb to the eye while the ref wasn't looking and then a finisher for the 1-2-3. I'm okay with it. Not sure what the cruiserweight division has to offer going forward, but they stand a better chance of being interesting with Enzo than with Kalisto as the champ.

WTF Match: Finn Balor/The Demon King vs. Bray Wyatt/Sister Abigail A.J. Styles

My prediction: Pain...and I guess Balor via pin
Result: Balor via pin

Look, maybe Wyatt would have won against Balor according to the original script. But there's no way they were going to book Styles with no buildup as being the first person to beat "The Demon King" version of Finn Balor.

Styles and Balor put on a pretty decent albeit very vanilla match. Would've liked to see more substance to it, but I understand that a guy flying across the globe and jumping in at the last second is probably not ready to give a match-of-the-year performance.

Only thing I'd add is that, in how the match played out, it felt like a waste of one of those first-ever "dream matches." Oh well.

The Shield (minus Reigns, plus Kurt Angle) vs. The Miz, Sheamus, Cesaro, Braun Strowman, and Kane

My prediction: The Shield via pin
Result: The Shield via pin

Adding Kurt Angle at the last minute didn't make the match less of a mess, that's for sure. I'd be interested to know how the match was originally booked, but my guess is that Angle filled Reigns' role pretty much to the letter. It seems like a situation where they would've sent Roman out via some big bump, had him return mid-match, just to continue conditioning people to cheer when they hear Roman's music.

The pop for Angle's music was definitely bigger than Reigns' would have been, though. And look, it was great to see Kurt in the ring again. He's so charismatic, so entertaining, and obviously still can get around pretty well. If that's his last ever match, he did it well.

Overall: 5/7 (71% correct)

As I said, I had a shitty weekend. My dog had surgery on Friday, and we really don't know if it was truly successful, or how long he has. So my head wasn't really in the PPV, and I can't say for sure how I felt about it. Probably I'll never be able to look at it objectively, because of all the emotions I've got associated with it now.

But in my current mentality, it was okay. I didn't like that we had so little in the way of story advancement, with all of the big players confined to 1.5 matches (and Lesnar obviously not on the show, because reasons). The matches were okay. And the main event, while a train wreck, was moderately entertaining. Good to see that Kane still can acquit himself pretty well in the ring. That guy's an all-time great.

Here's hoping Survivor Series gives us more story to work with (doubtful), and that my dog makes a full recovery. If I have to choose between them, though, Survivor Series can suck an egg.

Hang in there Franklin.

WWE TLC 2017 Predictions

In looking over this card, I'm having some regrets about starting up this whole "do a prediction blog for each PPV" policy. TLC looks to be a really, really, really bad pay-per-view.

The Universal, Intercontinental, and Raw Tag Team titles are all not being defended, which dramatically reduces the amount of excitement surrounding the card. When that happens, the other matches have to pick up the slack; Wyatt/Balor V and a 5-on-3 meaningless main event do not pick up said slack.

This is a pay-per-view that really would've benefited from a random Brock Lesnar title defense, but we don't even get that. This is gonna be bad.

Sasha Banks vs. Alicia Fox (Pre-Show)

I can't really bring myself to care about this match. I think Fox wins dirty, under the assumption that they hope this to be just the beginning of a feud. Also because heels always win the pre-show matches.

My prediction: Fox via pin

Cedric Alexander and Rich Swann vs. The Brian Kendrick and Jack Gallagher

I have to admit, I'm completely out of the loop when it comes to the cruiserweight feuds outside of the stuff that gets pushed on Raw. I like Jack Gallagher as a heel, and Kendrick has always been a really skilled performer. Swann and Alexander can put on decent matches too.

When in doubt on a Raw PPV, pick the heels.

My prediction: Kendrick and Gallagher

Emma vs. Asuka

With great writing and incredible work, Emma could win this match and keep the Asuka hype train moving, but the great writing doesn't exist in the current WWE. There's a non-zero chance they try it anyways, but my money is on the easy story here.

My prediction: Asuka via submission

Raw Women's Championship Match: Alexa Bliss (c) vs. Mickie James

Hard to say what's going to happen here. Initially I thought this was just a filler feud to set up for Bliss vs. Asuka, but the buildup has been effective at convincing me Mickie has a shot. Of course, now that I've become aware that the buildup is what's convincing me that Mickie has a shot, I'm back to my original viewpoint.

Yeah. Yeah that makes the most sense.

My prediction: Alexa Bliss via pin

Cruiserweight Championship Match: Kalisto (c) vs. Enzo Amore

As an aside, if Neville doesn't return to the WWE, it'll be another blow to an already unexciting cruiserweight division. It's a shame because the talent is there for a really exceptional division to exist, between Neville and Austin Aries, Akira Tozawa, Gallagher, Kendrick, and yes Enzo.

I remember being excited about cruiserweight matches back in the late 90s in WCW, with guys like Chris Jericho, Dean Malenko, Eddie Guerrero, Rey Mysterio Jr., etc. There's no reason you couldn't hit that same height when you're the only game in town.

Alright, back to this match. I feel like Enzo is likely to reclaim the title, no doubt through nefarious means. Maybe he puts together a small stable of heels who he "pays" to ensure his victory. Or maybe he wins on his own with something like his victory over Neville. Something predictable but useful.

My prediction: Amore via pin

WTF Match: Finn Balor/The Demon King vs. Bray Wyatt/Sister Abigail

I'm so pissed off at this "feud." I don't know why they dislike each other, I don't know what the premise is supposed to be with these alter-egos, I don't know why the one question left for Bray Wyatt would be answered with "it's just me in a dress." It feels like they didn't know what to do with Balor or Wyatt, so they just threw some terrible Hollywood director at the feud and figured it would get worked out.

Oh, which is exactly what happened with Wyatt and Orton earlier this year, with that bizarre projected bug ring at Wrestlemania and then the terrible House of Horrors match. I'm horrified to say it, but I wonder if Wyatt has some input on these miserable storylines.

Or maybe the deal was, "Okay, we'll let you win the title at Elimination Chamber, but then you have to let my idiot nephew Todd write all your stories the rest of the year." And Bray says, "Sure, how bad could they be?"

Oh Bray.

My prediction: Pain...and I guess Balor via pin

The Shield vs. The Miz, Sheamus, Cesaro, Braun Strowman, and Kane

Speaking of WTF. Why would you throw these five people together, and ignore the fact that The Miz already had a stable? Why would you book a 5-versus-3 match? Why did Kane come back? Why does TLC have the IC and Tag title holders in a non-title quasi-handicap match with random other folks?

WHAT THE F.

I think this match will be effectively a "no contest" in the end. This whole deal smacks of outside interference (Bo Dallas? Curtis Axel?), surprise returns (Samoa Joe? The Undertaker?), turns (Kane? Reigns?), and utter nonsense (everything WWE). But the WWE doesn't go with the "sports entertainment finish" these days, so I'll say that at the end, The Shield gets the victory, as they have three main-event-caliber wrestlers, and their opponents have 1.5 (Braun and sort of The Miz).

My prediction: The Shield via pin

My expectations were high for Hell In A Cell, and they were met and exceeded. My expectations for TLC are ridiculously low. I'm worried that they might not even be met.

I guess you never know.

WWE Hell in a Cell 2017 Results

For as ho-hum as No Mercy was, Hell in a Cell was actually a really, really good pay-per-view. While we still didn't get a ton in the way of story advancement, stuff did happen, and most of the matches were really entertaining. I'd say it was the best event the WWE has put on all year.

And that's not just because I had a lot of correct predictions.  :)

Chad Gable and Shelton Benjamin vs. The Hype Bros

My prediction: Gable and Benjamin via pin
Result: Gable and Benjamin via pin

Decent match, though nothing really happened. But that's what you usually get on the pre-show. I will say that Gable and Benjamin are starting to show some more chemistry, which I do appreciate. I wish they had an actual tag team name, but if they're entertaining I can get over it (see: Sheamus and Cesaro).

Randy Orton vs. Rusev

My prediction: Orton via RKOOUTTANOWHERE
Result: Orton via RKOOUTTANOWHERE

God, they gotta do something with Rusev. He's just so entertaining, such a great heel even during the match. His whole style, his crowd interactions, everything screams that he should have gotten the push that Jinder Mahal got. Frustrating.

Smackdown Tag Team Championship Match in Hell in a Cell: The New Day (c) vs. The Usos

My prediction: The Usos via pin
Result: The Usos via pin

This match was phenomenal. They had a bunch of great spots, the workers are great, they were creative and explosive. Hopefully this opens up The New Day for some singles competition as well, as it feels like a waste to have three great workers condensed into a single match every month.

Smackdown Women's Championship: Natalya (c) vs. Charlotte

My prediction: Charlotte via submission
Result: Charlotte via disqualification

I don't find Natalya all that entertaining to watch, and this match wasn't any exception. It wasn't a bad match or anything, just didn't feel like it had the excitement of a title match. That it ended in a DQ was fine with me; extending the strife between these two is okay, and you want Charlotte to stay strong. She doesn't need to take a loss to Natty, even a clean one.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Bobby Roode

My prediction: Ziggler via pin (dirty)
Result: Roode via pin

My first incorrect winner, but I'm okay with it. It set off a continuation of the feud, which is fine with these two accomplished workers. I also absolutely loved Ziggler's 80s heel entrance. I was just thinking that a no-music entrance would be a cool throwback, and while he wasn't the wrestler who came to mind, Ziggler ran with it perfectly.

I mean, of course he did. He's Dolph freakin' Ziggler.

United States Title Match: A.J. Styles (c) vs. Baron Corbin (vs. Tye Dillinger)

My prediction: Corbin via pin
Result: Corbin via pin

This was actually a really well-crafted match. During the pre-show, Dillinger chatted his way into the match after showing he beat Corbin on Smackdown, adding some last-minute excitement. Then for the finish, Styles hit his finisher on Dillinger but Corbin shoved him off and stole the pinfall. It worked out well for everyone.

And now that Styles lost his rematch on Smackdown, he can get out of the U.S. Title picture and into the WWE championship scene.

WWE Championship Match: Jinder Mahal (c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

My prediction: Nakamura via pin
Result: Mahal via pin

Mahal was about a C- in this match, which is considerably better than he's been in all of his other matches. It still wasn't good, but it was a bit better than usual. They probably could've afforded to drag out the ending a little more; if the Kinshasa is supposed to be a true finisher, an extra four seconds for Charles Robinson to get back in the ring shouldn't be the difference between a pin or a fail.

Anywho, overall the match was fine, probably bottom three on the night though, which isn't what you want out of your premier title. Hopefully something good is coming.

Hell in a Cell Match: Kevin Owens vs. Shane McMahon

My prediction: Owens via pin
Result: Owens via pin

Remember how I said my expectations were high for this match? Well, consider them met. Owens is such a great, animated competitor, his matches always seem to have so much meaning for his character.

The whole sequence where he sets Shane up on the table and tries to psyche himself up to jump off the cell onto him was just brilliant. Then when Shane climbed the cage and they executed a bunch of moves on top of the cell, even though they were on the same section and you knew it wouldn't break, there was always the worry that something would go horribly wrong. It was well-executed drama.

Then, finally, FINALLY, they had a PPV match end with some questions about what's going to happen next. The insertion of Sami Zayn to save Owens and then plop him on top of Shane for the win was a great way to refresh Sami's character and generate buzz for Smackdown.

Overall: 6/8 (75% correct)

Even though this PPV was fairly predictable (and really any non-mark should've gotten Roode and Mahal correct), it was immensely entertaining. Great matches, good story progression, good setups for future feuds, it was all there. It's no coincidence that the better brand seems to be the one with Kevin Owens on it. The man is just incredible at his job. And A.J. Styles is probably the best in-ring wrestler in the company.

RAW has The Shield again. So...I guess that's cool.

Good luck at TLC.

WWE No Mercy 2017 Results

No Mercy was alright. It reminded me of some of the old WWF Raw episodes, where you knew nothing was going to happen, but you got some fake-out title matches, and one or two "main event" level matches that you'd never seen.

It didn't elevate the level of recent PPV shows, though, not by a long shot. The two "Wrestlemania level matches" didn't even remotely live up to the hype. And there weren't any surprising undercard matches that made up for them.

Anyways, here's how it went, and how my predictions shaped up.

Pre-Show Match: Apollo Crews vs. Elias

My prediction: Apollo Crews via pin

Result: Elias via pin

Ah well, it's really not a match of much relevance. Maybe they build a mini-feud off of this, with Titus O'Neil getting back in the ring to fight Elias down the road. And maybe not. No one will care.

Cruiserweight Championship Match: Neville (C) vs. Enzo Amore

My prediction: Neville via submission
Result: Enzo via pin

I'm 0/2 so far. But in looking at the results for this one the day after, it works okay for me. The WWE needs 205 Live to have some more mustard, and Enzo is still pretty over. You can probably get 2-3 more matches out of these two, and then mix in a few other cruiserweights to finally establish your "main event" tier for the show.

Probably it won't work, but Enzo winning is a decent way to try to add some flavor. Of course, I think you could've gotten more out of Austin Aries if you'd given him the title in one of his forty-five matches, but hey, that's just me.

Enzo cheating to win is good going forward, though. Because you don't believe he could win fair. But if he cheats his ass off, who knows?

Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt

My prediction: Finn Balor via pin
Result: Finn Balor via pin

Hey, finally got one right. Of course, this match was perhaps the most insanely predictable 15 minutes of my life. Every single moment, it felt like you knew exactly what was going to happen next. You know who gets excited for that? Nobody.

Balor won, hopefully they let Wyatt sit for a while to figure out what to do with him next. Honestly, it wouldn't be terrible to just leave him off TV until January, and then have him come out as a modest surprise at the Royal Rumble.

Intercontinental Title Match: The Miz (C) vs. Jason Jordan

My prediction: Jason Jordan via DQ
Result: The Miz via pin

So I got the interference right, just not the final result. I thought this was actually a pretty good match; The Miz and Jordan actually had some decent in-ring chemistry, and both performed solidly (although I still think The Miz is just way too slow).

But the result made everything feel stupid. Much like the Singh Brothers' boring interference in Jinder Mahal's match against Shinsuke Nakamura at SummerSlam, this felt like the kind of result you would get on Raw, not on show you have to pay to watch.

Oh, and whoever decided that Renee Young should jump in the ring and interview Jordan right after the match should be fired. And banned from wrestling. And get Bonzai Dropped by the ghost of Yokozuna.

RAW Tag Team Championship Match: Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose (C) vs. Sheamus and Cesaro

My prediction: Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose via pin
Result: Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose via pin

Another highly predictable match, I think the WWE did us a disservice in this match though. Sheamus and Cesaro pulled off a number of heavily impactful moves, culminating with Sheamus hitting White Noise on Ambrose, followed by Cesaro POWER-BOMBING ROLLINS FROM THE TOP ROPE ONTO AMBROSE. And Ambrose kicked out.

No. No that's stupid. That's a move to end a match. Having someone kick out of that puts literally the whole show on blast, because it highlights how everything is scripted. "Great move, but it wasn't a finisher, so the guy kicks out." For a company that's all too happy to have matches end in schoolboy roll-up pins, they have a ridiculous aversion to acknowledging the impact of non-finisher moves.

Also Cesaro knocked out a couple teeth on the ring post. Crazy.

RAW Women's Championship Match: Alexa Bliss (C) vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley (vs. Emma)

My prediction: Alexa Bliss via pin
Result: Alexa Bliss via pin

Alright, now we're hitting stride, two in a row. Emma did fairly well in the match, a reminder that most women wrestlers these days actually can wrestle. The other competitors were fine, though overall unexceptional. Nia Jax is so obviously on a different planet from the other girls as far as size, but they did an alright job of using that effectively, by forcing the other women to team up to fight her. The four-person power-bomb of Nia onto the floor was a pretty good moment.

The finish was again very Raw-worthy, with Alexa sneaking a DDT on Bayley and getting a quick pin to retain. A fine match, if not a highlight.

John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

My prediction: Roman Reigns via pin
Result: Roman Reigns via pin

Really, really bad match. Things started slow as hell right from the get-go, with even the first few punches of the match taking 5-10 seconds each to "recover from" before advancing to the next move...usually another punch. I don't know if someone wasn't feeling well or something, but the whole match was incredibly slow.

The spot of Reigns spearing Cena onto the announce table was alright, but I liked it better when it was Reigns spearing the Undertaker. Some creativity people, jeez.

Reigns wins in utterly boring fashion: Kickout, Spear, Pin, Repeat. And you wonder why people boo this guy.

Universal Championship Match: Brock Lesnar (C) vs. Braun Strowman

My prediction: Brock Lesnar via pin

Result: Brock Lesnar via pin

Look, it was fine. For a standard match between two big guys, it was fine. But after SummerSlam, the excitement for Lesnar and Strowman to put on a great brawl was palpable, and they fell flat. Almost the entire match took place inside the ring, there was no real noticeably "violent" moments, and the two guys altogether did like six different moves.

If Braun's loss brings about some interesting changes for his character, maybe trying to coexist with a manager or some backup, that could be useful. But right now, he just came out looking like he could never beat Brock, so he might as well go home.

Overall: 5/8 (62.5%) Correct

No Mercy was kind of a nothing pay-per-view, but that's been the case for most of the non-big-four shows for a couple years now. Zero run-ins, one match with interference, one other match with some explicit cheating. One big spot, the power-bomb in the tag match, but the fact that it didn't win the match sapped that momentary excitement.

I get that not every PPV can be a winner. I even get that it's important for there to be less exciting PPVs, so that the good ones stand out even more. But when you're asking for money for these shows, and when you're adding an extra 6-8 PPVs every year with the brand split, and when you're talking about either increasing the price of the WWE Network or creating a second tier, you've got to deliver.

Still waiting.

WWE No Mercy 2017 Predictions

I'm trying a new thing. One of a short list of items that I try to keep up with is the WWE. While I haven't sat down and watched an episode of RAW or Smackdown in years (like, fifteen years maybe), I keep myself tuned in through various websites and a very entertaining recap show podcast, What's Wrong with Wrestling.

I also have a subscription to the WWE Network, and while most of my viewing is of classic wrestling content, the fact that the account provides live access to all current pay-per-views makes it very easy to keep up with the "big events." I've watched each of the PPV shows this year (though almost always on a delay; I normally work Sunday nights), and have enjoyed making my own predictions and seeing how they pan out.

So, because it's fairly easy writing and I've been hurting for content, the goal is to start making predictions for each WWE pay-per-view event, starting with No Mercy.

Here we go.

Pre-Show Match: Apollo Crews vs. Elias

While this match obviously doesn't have the backstory that a lot of the other ones do, I think it could actually be an entertaining battle. Crews is incredibly gifted in the ring, and Titus Worldwide is at least a stable, one of 2.5 in the company along with The Miztourage and whatever association Jinder Mahal and the Singh Brothers might call themselves.

I think it'll be a 10-12 minute match, with Crews picking up the victory. I'd hope against hope that something interesting happens, but that'd just be foolish.

Winner: Apollo Crews via pin

Cruiserweight Championship Match: Neville (C) vs. Enzo Amore

Neville is one of the more entertaining wrestlers in the company. He's agile and violent, and he's a really effective heel right now. Enzo, meanwhile, has spent the past three months getting the shit kicked out of him by various big guys, with a few random 205 Live wins sprinkled in.

The problem here is that Enzo's strongest skill is his ability to take a massive bump and look like he just got murdered. Braun tossing him around, Big Cass smashing in his face, these worked. Against Neville, he's not going to be able to sell that. So does he win?

I don't think so. I believe that Neville being champion is the only thing that lends legitimacy to the cruiserweight division right now. He was able to elevate Akira Tozawa into at least a watchable star, and the WWE needs him to stay as a brutal heel champion to pull a few more 205 stars up to his level. Enzo can be entertaining in a loss; that's been basically his entire career.

Winner: Neville via submission

Finn Balor vs. Bray Wyatt

Oh, god, why?

Look, they're both solid workers, and they put on a decent match. But Bray Wyatt needs to be off TV for like, four months. He needs to lose this match and then disappear to "find his smile." And by that I mean he needs to go reacquire a Family. A cult leader without any cult is just a guy shouting at the moon.

There are so many cool things you can do with Wyatt and a stable, but they won't happen here. So just let Balor win, and get ready for his brief jump up to the main event where he'll get annihilated by the big hogs.

Winner: Finn Balor via pin

Intercontinental Title Match: The Miz (C) vs. Jason Jordan

Jordan is a terrible singles wrestler. He had some chemistry with Chad Gable as a tag team, and he's pretty good in the ring. But on his own, when he has to use his own words to generate pops, he's utterly incapable. It takes a special kind of awkward to transcend Roman Reigns in terms of failed promos, and Jordan does it every week he opens his mouth.

Given all that...I expect Jordan to win the match. Shenanigans, probably. My pick is a straight DQ finish where The Miz retains, but it's entirely possible that some failed interference attempt by Bo Dallas or Curtis Axel could cost Miz the match and the title. But it seems wasteful to build up to this match for two months and have Jordan NOT win, even if he doesn't grab the belt.

Winner: Jason Jordan via DQ

RAW Tag Team Championship Match: Seth Rollins & Dean Ambrose (C) vs. Sheamus & Cesaro

Phew, those tag team names are a handful. I miss the days of the Headshrinkers and Demolition and Strike Force and The Rockers. I guess we still have some of that over on Smackdown, with The New Day, The Usos, The Hype Bros, and Breezango.

Anyways.

I really enjoy Sheamus and Cesaro, honestly. I wouldn't mind seeing them get the titles back. They're 'tweener enough that they can feud with anybody, and big enough assholes that they can get heat in any matchup. They kind of remind me of the Acolytes, actually.

But everything with Rollins and Ambrose since SummerSlam has been chaos. Three-way tags, eight-man tags, it's been just silliness. I don't see them losing their first title defense to the same guys from whom they won the belts.

Winner: Seth Rollins & Dean Ambrose via pin

RAW Women's Championship Match: Alexa Bliss (C) vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley (vs. Emma)

First off, let's set aside Emma. She's just there to take a few bumps and then take the eventual fall in the match...I hope.

Even without considering the fifth member of the match, I still think it's a tough nut to crack. There are reasons and ways to have each of the other four competitors win and have it make sense. Sasha could win, eliminating the question of why she never got a one-on-one rematch with Alexa Bliss. Nia could definitely win, as we all sort of expect her to win the title at some point. Bayley could win by screwing over Sasha a little bit, beginning the simmer on a feud that culminates in a Wrestlemania match.

But in all circumstances, the most likely result of a championship match is that the champion retains. Especially because it's a big match, with the potential for a complicated series of twists and turns that set up the women's division for the next couple months, I don't think you need a title change on top of that. Title changes should matter, and in this situation, you just don't need it.

Plus Alexa looks so sexy with that belt. Never ever take it away from her.

Winner: Alexa Bliss via pin

John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

The promos between Cena and Reigns have been must-see TV, though at times they were a bit too real for me. I don't want to see behind the curtain most of the time, at least not on the show itself. Still, they were plenty entertaining, and reminded us why we all enjoyed John Cena for a long time.

There's a lot of talk about how this match can set up XYZ at Survivor Series, or the Royal Rumble, or Wrestlemania, and that Cena winning is the best way to do that. I disagree.

Since defeating the Undertaker at Wrestlemania, here are Reigns' PPV appearances:

• He lost via pin to Strowman at Payback.
• He lost a five-way match to Samoa Joe at Extreme Rules.
• He lost an ambulance match to Strowman at Great Balls of Fire.
• And he lost a fatal four-way for the Universal Title to Brock Lesnar.

He can't keep losing big matches. Even though it's Cena, I think we're in store for a Kickout-Spear-Pin-Repeat.

Winner: Roman Reigns via pin

Universal Championship Match: Brock Lesnar (C) vs. Braun Strowman

The hot internet rumor is that the WWE is angling for a Reigns/Lesnar matchup to headline Wrestlemania in 2018...you know, because it worked out so well the first time around.

Sarcasm.

The reason I brought that up is that people seem to think that Lesnar is likely to win this match in order to keep the Universal title on Reigns or Lesnar, to preserve the title matchup. That's not necessary though; we saw the WWE title move around several times last year in order to serve various storylines. The Wyatt/Orton storyline was ultimately a disaster, but that was going to happen regardless of the WWE title because Orton is utterly checked-out.

All that said, I still expect Lesnar to come out on top. The "main" titles generally don't get moved around without a good reason, and there's no good reason to take the belt off of Lesnar here. Braun can still be a monster without the belt, and in fact, his story becomes more interesting if he's unable to win the title on his own. He could start looking for a manager, or allies, etc. And while I'd prefer for Strowman to win, so that we could get the belt on the show every week, this isn't about what I want to happen. It's about what I predict. That's my pick.

Winner: Brock Lesnar via pin

The 2015 NHL Playoffs - Can the Caps Pull It Off?

As most of you know, I'm a big fan of the Washington Capitals. Now, I won't lie and say I grew up a hockey fan, because it's just not true. I didn't follow the Caps until they made the Stanley Cup finals in 1998, and I didn't really start to follow the Caps until they made the playoffs again for the first time under Bruce Boudreau. They went on a fantastic run to finish the season, then came back to win their playoff series against the Rangers with three straight wins.

Since then, I've been tuned in for hundreds of Capitals games, and have learned a great deal about the sport. I've also gotten a job working at an ice rink, which guarantees considerable exposure to hockey discussion, as well as actual, real-life hockey.

And this is the best Washington Capitals team I've ever seen.

Well, let me clarify. The President's Trophy winning team from 2009-2010 was an offensive juggernaut, and probably a more impressive team than this one. But I don't think there's been a team in Washington that has appeared more capable of bringing home a Stanley Cup since Alexander Ovechkin came to town. The Capitals this year have been a tough team to play against, and yet they've got as much skill as they ever have (apologies to Alex Semin fans). Evgeny Kuznetsov has really started to grow as a two-way player, and his development has freed up Barry Trotz to mix Backstrom into a now-potent second line. On top of that, the defensive additions of Brooks Orpik and Matt Niskanen have really solidified an already skilled back end, and allowed Mike Green to be deployed more responsibly.

Offense, defense, and Braden Holtby can go toe-to-toe with any goalie in the league in a playoff series (and has). I'm excited for these playoffs to begin.

So...predictions!

WESTERN CONFERENCE

 St. Louis Blues vs. Minnesota Wild

The Blues have been circling around for a deep playoff run for a few years now. I've always been a huge fan of David Backes, and I think this might be the year they finally break through. Zach Parise is a fantastic two-way player for Minnesota, but I think the Blues are too strong top-to-bottom.

Prediction: Blues in 5

Nashville Predators vs. Chicago Blackhawks

Definitely the most interesting first-round matchup out west for me, the Blackhawks are perhaps the most skilled team in hockey if Patrick Kane can come back healthy. Meanwhile, the Predators turned in one of their best seasons in history in their first season without Barry Trotz at the helm. I do think that Nashville is a great squad, but I'm expecting Kane to come back, and if he does, there's too much firepower on Chicago for the Preds to handle.

Prediction: Blackhawks in 7

Anaheim Ducks vs. Winnipeg Jets

This is definitely an interesting pairing. Anaheim boasts three of the most disliked players west of the Mississippi in Corey Perry, Ryan Getzlaf, and Ryan Kesler, but part of that dislike comes from those guys being really, really good. Perry in particular is a game-changer. The Jets are one of the darlings of the playoffs this year, but I don't think people actually expect them to, you know, win games. Me neither.

Prediction: Ducks in 5

Vancouver Canucks vs. Calgary Flames

After Mark Giordano went down, I'll be honest, I didn't think the Flames stood a chance in hell of maintaining a playoff spot. They fought tooth and nail down to the wire, though, and managed to hold off the defending champion L.A. Kings in securing a playoff berth. They actually had the best point differential in the Pacific Division, which includes these same Canucks. I don't expect the Flames to go deep into the playoffs, but I think Vancouver is primed for being upset...that they lose!

Prediction: Flames in 7

EASTERN CONFERENCE

Montreal Canadiens vs. Ottawa Senators

Montreal had a great season, and their reward is a first-round matchup with the hottest team in these playoffs. It's a fair bet that Andrew Hammond won't be able to keep up his near-perfect performance of the past month, but the Senators have nothing to lose here. They've been playing with renegade confidence, and Montreal's top scorer Max Pacioretty is day-to-day with a head injury. It's hockey, so Pacioretty will probably play, but will he be the same player? Tough to say. In the end, I'll favor the team with Carey Price, but this is going to be a scrap.

Prediction: Canadiens in 7

Tampa Bay Lightning vs. Detroit Red Wings

People are calling this the Yzerman series, but these Red Wings are a long way from the transcendent squads that Stevie Y used to captain. I believe that Pavel Datsyuk is one of the greatest players of this generation, but he's always dinged up. And the Lightning can roll out two really dangerous lines, one of which includes maybe the best individual scorer in hockey, Steven Stamkos. I expect this to be a well-played series with a ton of skill, but I feel like Tampa's got the edge.

Prediction: Lightning in 6

Now for the two big ones.

New York Rangers vs. Pittsburgh Penguins

This has got to be the most appealing series for the casual sports fan who wants to tune in and see some hockey. You have the best player in the game in Sidney Crosby, maybe the best goalie in the game in Henrik Lundqvist, two storied franchises, and two passionate fan bases. The only problem is that Pittsburgh isn't very good right now. They haven't played a lick of defense since February, and their legitimate scoring threats are limited to their top two lines. It's possible that Marc-Andre Fleury will stand on his head and take a game, or two, or even the series, but the smart money is on the Rangers getting past this round with relative ease.

Prediction: Rangers in 5

Washington Capitals vs. New York Islanders

I certainly wasn't pleased with the way the Capitals looked in their final game of the season, a 4-2 loss to the Rangers, but the liquid fire Columbus Blue Jackets did Washington a favor by beating the Isles in their final game as well, to give the Caps home-ice advantage for this series. The Isles are actually a decent matchup for the Caps; while they boast about the same skill level, they're still unproven when it comes to the playoffs, and their defensive corps is more built to score goals than to put the hammer down on opposing forwards. The Caps roll four solid lines, and Jaroslav Halak isn't an elite goaltender. The Capitals should be able to pull this one out.

Prediction: Capitals in 6

2015 Fantasy Baseball - First Round Busts and Busters

Every year, fantasy baseball sees several new faces at the top of drafts, and every year a couple of last year's heroes turn into this year's zeroes. It's usually difficult to predict this sort of thing, but that's absolutely not my concern. I'm going to make some wild predictions here (potentially more bold than my "bold" predictions) about this year's first round picks, and about some players who aren't in the top two rounds this year, but I foresee making the jump.

First, let's look at who actually is a first-round pick, according to Yahoo:

Yahoo's Top Twelve Players, According to O-Rank

1. Mike Trout, OF, Angels
2. Andrew McCutchen, OF, Pirates
3. Clayton Kershaw, SP, Dodgers
4. Miguel Cabrera, 1B/3B, Tigers
5. Paul Goldschmidt, 1B, Diamondbacks
6. Giancarlo Stanton, OF, Marlins
7. Carlos Gomez, OF, Brewers
8. Jose Abreu, 1B, White Sox
9. Adam Jones, OF, Orioles
10. Jose Bautista, 1B/OF, Blue Jays
11. Anthony Rizzo, 1B, Cubs
12. Edwin Encarnacion, 1B, Blue Jays

Let's go player-by-player:

1. Mike Trout, OF, Angels
2. Andrew McCutchen, OF, Pirates
3. Clayton Kershaw, SP, Dodgers

Barring massive injury, I think these guys are safe bets to stick around at least a few years. Transcendent talents.

4. Miguel Cabrera, 1B/3B, Tigers

Cabrera is interesting, because I really think he's going to do well this year, but it's very likely that he loses 3B going into next year. Probably still a first-round pick, though. He's the best hitter the league has seen since Manny Ramirez.

5. Paul Goldschmidt, 1B, Diamondbacks
6. Giancarlo Stanton, OF, Marlins
7. Carlos Gomez, OF, Brewers
8. Jose Abreu, 1B, White Sox
I expect all four of these guys to remain in the first or early second rounds, depending on their relative performances and health. Goldschmidt, Stanton, and Abreu are all high end power talent, and even though people still mistrust Gomez, he's been a power-speed guy for years now. It's time to buy in.

9. Adam Jones, OF, Orioles

Jones is a tough nut to crack. In a full season, he's almost a lock for .280-90-30-90. His speed is fading, and his plate discipline is zero (he walked just 19 times last year), but consistent power, average, and run production will always have value. I think he'll drop to the second round next year, but no farther than around 18th.

10. Jose Bautista, 1B/OF, Blue Jays

I hate thinking of Jose Bautista as "old" since he's two-and-a-half months younger than me, but the reality is that 34 is pretty old in baseball (maybe this is why it always seems to be sports fans who have midlife crises). If he stays healthy, he's probably got another year or two of top tier production, but his batting average dips in 2012 and 2013 give me pause.

11. Anthony Rizzo, 1B, Cubs

I don't trust Rizzo, but he's got fair pedigree. I expect him to regress a little, but still be in the ballpark of .270 and 30 HR, and at his age, that'll keep people buying. I predict other people will have him in the first round again next year, and I predict I still won't.

12. Edwin Encarnacion, 1B, Blue Jays

Encarnacion is like his teammate Bautista in a lot of ways. They both had slow starts to their careers, and they both appear to be top-level mashers with modest batting averages. I just don't trust Encarnacion. He has the smell of Adam Dunn to me, and that means while I expect he'll still hit with power, his dropoff in other categories will be precipitous. With a history of back ailments, I think there's a reasonable chance that Edwin could slip again this year, down to a .240-.260 hitting 1B with very good pop. On your draft boards, that's somewhere between David Ortiz (48) and Chris Carter (96).

My bets for dropping out of Yahoo's top round in 2016 are #9 Adam Jones, #10 Jose Bautista, and #12 Edwin Encarnacion. The rest I expect to stick around, again, barring massive injury.

Now for the more fun part: who's taking their spots? Since I have three guys dropping from the first round, I'm going to give you three guys to take their places. And to maximize the fun(/crazy) aspect, I'll only pick people outside of the top 25.


Yu Darvish, SP, Rangers (#36)
It's extremely difficult for a starting pitcher to get into the first round of a fantasy draft. The fact that Kershaw has been securely in the first round for multiple years is pretty remarkable. I think Darvish has that kind of next-level talent. His strikeout rate is fantastic, a must-have for a first round pitcher. While last season was cut short for him because of elbow inflammation, I think he's closer to his 2013 performance at his core. That's 2.83/1.07/.194 batting-average-against, for those of you unwilling to Google the man.

Joey Votto, 1B, Reds (#59)
I've never been totally wild about Joey Votto. I'm still not all the way on board with drafting guys who don't really have any speed upside; I always seem to have trouble finding steals. But in today's fantasy baseball world, batting average and run production puts you near the top of the draft. Votto has never hit lower than .297 in any season in which he played at least 100 games, and he still hits in Cincinnati, one of the better hitting ballparks out there. He may suffer from "broken heart syndrome," where people discount him because they got burned drafting him the past couple years, but I think a bounce-back is very possible, and that would put him right in the mix for the first round.

Not crazy enough for you? Alright, well how about...


Manny Machado, 3B, Orioles (#123)
If I'm being honest, I wouldn't bet much money on Machado actually breaking into the top 12 of Yahoo's O-Rank next season. That said, I think there's a ton of room for improvement here, and, just as importantly, I think the fantasy community is ready to believe in him. Machado was a top-tier prospect who's acquitted himself well in the major leagues. He's still just 22, which means there's plenty of time for him to evolve into the type of player he was projected to be. He's never been much of a speedster, but with a reasonable level of improvement, I don't think it's out of the question to see him take a 2006-Matt-Holliday-sized leap forward. A line of .310/100/30/100 is feasible, and at third base, that's first round magic.

So there you have it, my take on the first round this year and next. Stay tuned this season to see how right I was (or on the off chance I was slightly wrong, to harass me for it).

2015 Major League Baseball Bold Predictions

Everyone wants to be the guy who "just knew" something was going to happen before everyone else did. I drafted Clayton Kershaw the year before he exploded onto the scene, and I did the same with Jose Abreu last season. I'll always remember those "clever" picks (though really they were mostly lucky).

So this year, I'm going to make a bold prediction about each team, or a player on that team. Some will be bolder than others, naturally. But I'm posting this as a record for all to see, so that you may either laud my precognition or laugh at my foolishness come October.

AL East

Baltimore Orioles - Jonathan Schoop will hit 30 home runs, but he'll still have his name mispronounced regularly.
Boston Red Sox - All of the Red Sox' changes will appear to pay off from a statistical standpoint, but inexplicably won't be reflected in the win-loss columns. Boston will be out of the playoff mix by August.
New York Yankees - The Yankees will start off hot, and sometime before May 31st, there'll be a prominent story somewhere talking about how Derek Jeter was holding back the Yankees in his final years.
Tampa Bay Rays - Evan Longoria will the finest season of his career, but he won't be able to help the Rays stay out of last place.
Toronto Blue Jays - A Blue Jay will hit 50 home runs in 2015. I can't get more specific than that, but they have so much power in their lineup that someone is bound to go off.

AL Central

Chicago White Sox - Jose Abreu won't lead the team in home runs, but he will be the team's highest vote-getter for MVP.
Cleveland Indians - The Indians will be the only team in baseball to get single-digit home runs from their combined first basemen.
Detroit Tigers - Everything will go wrong this year (it's already starting with Victor Martinez's surgery), and Detroit will finish second-to-last in the AL Central.
Kansas City Royals - The Royals will hit, but the rotation will crumble like a saltine in a blender. They'll try Wade Davis in the rotation. It'll work out well, and he'll be a sexy fantasy pick next year.
Minnesota Twins - The Twins will finish last in the division, but things will look up towards the end of the season as prospects acquit themselves well.

AL West

The "California" Angels - The Angels will break through and win the West going away, and two starting pitchers will receive votes for the Cy Young award, though neither will win. They'll lose in the World Series because Huston Street will be injured.
Houston Astros - Houston's record won't be any better than they were last year, but they'll be way more fun to watch. And by that I mean their bullpen will blow thirty saves, but they'll win half of those games anyways.
Oakland Athletics - Brett Lawrie will be exactly as uninspiring as he was in Toronto, except that even fewer of his hits will leave the yard due to the spacious Oakland Coliseum. The magic will be over, and the A's will fall behind the rest of the division, for one year anyways.
Seattle Mariners - Despite the large yard, the Mariners will be one of the top home run hitting teams in the AL. Nelson Cruz will mash.
Texas Rangers - The Rangers will never get going, and Adrian Beltre will be on a different team by the end of the year.

NL East

Atlanta Braves - Freddie Freeman will hit .280 with 20 HR again. That's not the bold part, though. The bold prediction is that people will actually realize that he's simply a serviceable first baseman, and not the masher that fantasy "experts" seem to think he is.
Miami Marlins - Jose Fernandez won't pitch for the Marlins this year.
New York Mets - The Mets will have three pitchers toss 175+ strikeouts, but still won't be able to hit a lick.
Philadelphia Phillies - Despite being in obvious "rebuilding" mode, the Phillies' starting pitchers will keep them in a lot of games, and they'll be competitive for the first third of the season. Then Cliff Lee, Aaron Harang, and Carlos Ruiz will be traded, and the Phillies will be "who we thought they were."
Washington Nationals - Despite a strong lineup and one of the best starting rotations in history, the Nationals will have problems winning close games. They'll reacquire Tyler Clippard for far more than they got when they traded him away. But they'll win the World Series, so it'll be worth it.

NL Central

Chicago Cubs - Jon Lester will suck this year.
Cincinnati Reds - The wheels will fall off for Billy Hamilton, but Joey Votto will flourish again, and the Reds will compete for a Wild Card berth.
Milwaukee Brewers - Jean Segura and Ryan Braun will have bounce-back years, but the rotation isn't strong enough for the Brew Crew to be serious contenders.
Pittsburgh Pirates - Between batting position, playing time, and managerial support, Gregory Polanco will be given every opportunity to succeed...and he just won't.
St. Louis Cardinals - Jason Heyward won't have the explosion that everyone seems to think he'll have, nor will Kolten Wong evolve into much more than he was last year, but it won't matter; the Cardinals will still win the division.

NL West

Arizona Diamondbacks - The D'Backs starting pitchers will have the fewest total innings of any team in history, which obviously won't bode well for the season's outlook.
Colorado Rockies - The Rockies will have two 20-20 outfielders, but neither will be Carlos Gonzalez.
Los Angeles Dodgers - Kershaw and the gang will once again dominate on the mound, but without Hanley Ramirez and Matt Kemp, the team will struggle to score runs. No playoffs this year for the boys in blue.
San Diego Padres - Kemp, Justin Upton, and Wil Myers will all flourish in San Diego. The Padres, despite playing in massive Petco Park, will score in bunches and nab a Wild Card spot.
San Francisco Giants - Joe Panik will win the NL batting title.

Yeah, I decided to go with something memorable and bananas to finish, to give you guys an easy razz you can use anytime.

2014 NFL Predictions - Midway Madness

After a few posts on Magic, I figured I'd better post about sports again so you guys don't think (/realize) I'm a total nerd. Football!

Every team has now played at least eight games, and the standings are looking very interesting. Coming into the season, I'd have never expected to see the Arizona Cardinals at the top of the NFC West. There's still plenty of football to be played, but the season is starting to take shape. So, given the information we've got to this point, here's where I think things will end up after week 17.

AFC


East: New England Patriots - It's hard to pick against Tom Brady and Bill Belichick, much as I might dislike them. Spoiler: it's a lot.
North: Pittsburgh Steelers - Don't look now, but the Steelers just scored 94 points against two teams above .500 over the past two weeks (Colts & Ravens). They're never down for long.

South: Indianapolis Colts - I don't think Andrew Luck is ready for the big time like everybody else does, but in the AFC's weakest division, he's far and away the best QB.
West: Denver Broncos - I'll be a Philip Rivers fan until the day I die, but there's no denying Peyton Manning's regular season domination. He's a force.

Wild Cards: Miami Dolphins and Kansas City Chiefs - Both defenses look legit, and I'm becoming a believer in Ryan Tannehill. Andy Reid can't help but put his teams in the playoffs.

NFC

East: Philadelphia Eagles - I don't think Dallas's perceived problems on defense were false; as the season goes on, I expect them to look worse, not better.
North: Green Bay Packers - The Lions have been good, but in today's NFL, I don't believe you can average fewer than 21 points a game and win long-term.
South: Carolina Panthers - Ron Rivera coached the cats out of a funk last year, I'm betting he can do it again. The Saints' run appears to be over.
West: Seattle Seahawks - I just can't bring myself to believe the Cardinals will finish as strong as they started. The defending champs will get back into form.

Wild Cards: Arizona Cardinals and San Francisco 49ers - Maybe I'm wrong about Detroit, but I just can't see things ending well in Motor City. And I expect the Cowboys to fall back to earth...and then some.

Super Bowl Prediction: Green Bay Packers over Pittsburgh Steelers - Because nothing new and fun ever happens.

I wanted to get this down on paper so you can hold me accountable for it down the road. So when the Super Bowl matches the Lions against the Dolphins, feel free to throw angry comments at me.

Baltimore Orioles vs. Kansas City Royals - Position By Position

I was watching SportsCenter yesterday, and I saw a segment in which Eduardo Perez went position-by-position among hitters and compared the two American League teams that will begin the Championship Series tonight: the upstart Kansas City Royals and my hometown Baltimore Orioles. I found myself interested in the results for obvious reasons; I like hearing what people think of the Orioles, and since we've had a little break here in between series, I'm frothing for baseball talk.

Well, Eduardo Perez seems to be stuck in his Cincinnati/St. Louis years, and can't get away from middle America, because his picks were mostly insane. Alright, not insane, but I disagreed with more than one. So, I decided to do my own comparison. It'll have to be quick, since the series starts today and I want this posted beforehand, so I can be accountable for my absurd claims. But I'll provide as much information as I can, and I'll definitely fly off at the handle on at least one of these.

Here we go. (Name preceded by * is my choice. WAR numbers, and most other statistics, retrieved from baseball-reference.com)

Catcher
*Kansas City - Salvador Perez (WAR 3.3) (Eduardo's pick)
Baltimore - Nick Hundley (0.1)/Caleb Joseph (1.2)

Can't really argue with Eduardo on this one. Perez is a solid hitter and has a good arm for throwing out base-stealers. That won't matter much against an Orioles team that doesn't run, but even if the Orioles never get caught stealing, Perez is a better catcher and better hitter than either of Baltimore's guys. If Matt Wieters were healthy this would be closer, but since he's not, Perez takes it easily.

First Base
Kansas City - Eric Hosmer (0.8) (Eduardo's pick)
*Baltimore - Steve Pearce (6.0)

Here we go, my first disagreement with Eduardo, but I can't really blame Eddie. He's fallen into the trap of recency. Eric Hosmer had an amazing Division series, hitting .500 and delivering a number of clutch hits for the Royals. But the reality is, there's no reason to expect Hosmer to continue to mash that way. His career slash line is .275/.328/.418. A .418 slugging percentage for your first baseman? Ask the Nationals how that turned out (sorry Adam LaRoche). I'll grant you that Pearce's performance this season has been somewhat out-of-nowhere, but so was Nelson Cruz's in 2009, and it turns out he can play.

Also of note is that Hosmer is actually a small minus as a defender, with a -0.3 dWAR. Maybe it comes into play, maybe it doesn't, but it's worth noting. Pearce, for what it's worth, posted a 1.5 dWAR.

Second Base
*Kansas City - Omar Infante (0.7) (Eduardo's pick)
Baltimore - Jonathan Schoop (1.5)

I would've liked to pick Schoop here, and obviously with their comparative WARs, I'd have had some justifications. Schoop was actually a really solid defender this year, and I like his pop, but I have a lot more faith in Infante. Infante is a veteran with some playoff experience. While he has been an abysmal batter in the playoffs, I don't buy into that as a characteristic. I think his experience will only prove to be a positive going forward.

And yes, I'm aware that Infante is 0/11 this postseason. I'm still leaning in his direction.

Third Base
*Kansas City - Mike Moustakas (0.4)
Baltimore - Ryan Flaherty (1.1)
(Eduardo called this a push)

While my pick is Moustakas by a hair, the reality is that neither guy figures to be a difference-maker in the series. Moustakas was a high draft pick who's shown very little hitting prowess outside of the occasional home run. Flaherty, meanwhile, is also a light-hitting marginal player. Moustakas showed some pop in the series against the California Angels (I'll never change), and he's got more pedigree, so he gets the nod. If Manny Machado were healthy, this would be a no-brainer pick for the O's though. Just another sad reminder of how injuries affect every season.

Shortstop
Kansas City - Alcides Escobar (2.4)
*Baltimore - J.J. Hardy (3.4) (Eduardo's pick)

Alcides Escobar is a slap hitter with good speed but minimal power. He's also one of those players who gets a reputation for being a good fielder because of his speed, when in reality he's simply average. Hardy, on the other hand, has been a plus defender at shortstop for years, winning Gold Glove Awards in 2012 and 2013. He historically has had good power as well, though it disappeared for most of the year. He beat up on the Tigers in the Divisional series, and clubbed what looked like an important homer in Game 1 (though that was before the O's went for 8 in the bottom of the eighth). I like Hardy here.

Left Field
*Kansas City - Alex Gordon (6.6) (Eduardo's pick)
Baltimore - Alejandro De Aza (0.7)

The Orioles have gone with a couple different options in the outfield, but De Aza seems to be the weapon of choice right now. He's been fine, but obviously Gordon is vital to the Royals and a much better player. I know his WAR was 6.6 this year, but when I heard Eduardo Perez say that Gordon is going to be in the MVP discussion this year, I lost my head. Gordon is a plus-plus defensive player, and that's great. But his offensive statistics simply don't warrant consideration. He played in 156 games, but didn't break 90 runs or RBI. He hit .266 with 19 homers. He stole 12 bases. Let me know which of those numbers you want to point to as MVP caliber.

Gordon is my pick, but come on Eddie. Don't make a fool of yourself.

Center Field
Kansas City - Lorenzo Cain (5.0)
*Baltimore - Adam Jones (4.9) (Eduardo's pick)

Get serious. I love Lorenzo Cain as much as the next guy, but get serious.

Right Field
Kansas City - Nori Aoki (1.0) (Eduardo's pick)
*Baltimore - Nick Markakis (2.1)

I actually don't agree that Markakis is even 2 wins better than a replacement-level player, but he's still better than Aoki. Aoki is representative of the whole Royals team: he's a guy with speed, decent batting average, and minimal power. He apparently posted a -1.3 dWAR, which I suppose I have to trust since I haven't seen him play outside of some limited playoff time. Markakis is mostly an on-base guy with a little pop and the ability to get around the bases. He's actually really good at scoring from second or going first-to-third on a single, which helps keep the pressure on and threaten big innings. So he's got that going for him.

Designated Hitter
Kansas City - Billy Butler (-0.3)
Baltimore - Nelson Cruz (4.7)
(No pick by Eduardo)

I thought about just letting the two WARs speak for themselves, but I decided I wanted to mention Cruz's stats for posterity. Also, Eduardo Perez simply ignored the DH spot, which basically writes off the Orioles' best hitter. Cruz hit 40 home runs to lead the American League this season, and if possible, he's gotten even more deadly in the postseason. He hit .500 against the Tigers in the ALDS, but that's nothing new for Cruz. In his career, he's hit .297 with 16 HR in 37 postseason games, and he figures once again to be the lynchpin for the Orioles' offense.

Pitching

These two teams actually have pretty similar pitching staffs. The best pitcher is a Royal (James Shields), but there's truthfully not much separating Shields from Chris Tillman, Wei-Yin Chen, or his teammate Yordano Ventura. Additionally, both bullpens are strong, though I'd give an edge to the Orioles, owing mostly to their trade deadline acquisition of Andrew Miller. He was an expensive addition, but that guy is as good as advertised.

Eduardo declared that the Royals had better pitching and defense.

Wrap-Up and Prediction

Listen, it's still baseball. I think the Orioles are the better hitting team, and the stats on Baseball Reference say that in fact they were the best fielding team in the majors this year. Their starters are okay, and their bullpen is excellent. But you still have to play the games. Just ask the Angels, Dodgers, and Nationals. I desperately want the Orioles to win, but everybody's going to have their day. Still, it's hard to go against all this data I managed to assemble, even if I did probably look at it with a biased point of view. So, what the heck.

Prediction: Baltimore Orioles over Kansas City Royals (4 games to 1)